Is Your Spouse Too Needy? Looking For Relationship Problem Advice?

Is your spouse or maybe another close relation driving you nuts with their neediness?

You love them, but you don’t love being sucked dry?

Even healthy relationships have their challenges.

The relationship problem advice you are seeking might give you as much insight into your own neediness as your spouse’s.

The source of neediness within a relationship lies with the “inner-child” needs and issues of both parties.

Both your inner child and their’s need to be considered to discover creative ways to nurture your relationship and satisfy that needy feeling.

In case you don’t know this about me, I’m a parenting instructor as well as a health coach.  When I get the chance, I teach Redirecting Children’s Behavior.

Whether I teach it in a classroom or over the fence to the neighbor, I’ve seen this powerful information change lives!

Understanding why your children do what they do is empowering all by itself.  Teaching them to meet their own needs empowers them and satisfies that needy feeling.

Redirecting Behavior starts with nurturing yourself and making sure your “bank” is full.  Then it is important to nurture all the important relationships in your life by making deposits in the “bank” of the one you love, more often than you withdraw from it!

When dealing with adults it is easy to see how nurturing their inner child will get you a whole lot further than arguing with them.

In the case of self sabotage, the answers lie within.  The answers lie with YOUR inner child.

Want to understand the inner child that’s driving you nuts?

If you are self sabotaging, or your needy spouse is mis-behaving you need to understand what might be the underlying goal of the behavior.

The first sign that this is an issue is probably going to be your irritation with yourself and/or others.

When you feel irritated, ask yourself which of the mistaken goals below might be the issue. Read more

Do Milestones Cause Anniversary Sayings?

Happy one year anniversary Heart Failure Solutions! The milestone certainly has me reflecting with anniversary sayings.

It seems that milestones actually cause these corny quotes that are handed down through the generations!

What sort of corny quotes might come to mind after a year of blog building, you might ask?

If you’ve ever built a blog and kept at it for a year, you know that it is quite a feat!  The challenge is to keep your passion burning.  That’s what drives you!

My kids are the ones who have labeled me corny.

Maybe corny comes with the wrinkles.  But I have to admit, I really feel emotional reflecting on the past year.  It has been an amazing journey!

The anniversary sayings I would choose to honor my milestone may not be the ones you would choose.  That is what makes everyone’s journey unique.  Please share yours if you feel inspired!

If God leads you to it, he will lead you through it.

When you say “I can’t”, you actually mean “I don’t want to”.

Only those who attempt the absurd will achieve the impossible.

God doesn’t necessarily call the qualified,

he qualifies the called.

“Don’t be so humble, you’re not that great”. – Golda Meir

Never give up a true friend, they will stay till the end.

True friendship is like sound health; the value of it is seldom known until it is lost.

Your enemies can hurt you, but only your fear defeats you! Only those who risk going too far will ever know how far they can go.

If a million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing. ~Anatole France [Jacques Anatole Thibault] (1844-1924)

Things are not always what they seem, A stopped clock is right twice a day!

Fear is a natural reaction to moving closer to the truth. -Pema Chodron

For those who have experienced joy no explanation is necessary.

For those who haven’t, no explanation is possible.

Kindness costs nothing, but pays big dividends.

I refuse to tip toe cautiously thru life only to arrive safely at deaths door.

It is better to be a little lonely than to be a whole lot miserable.

Cry when you need to, laugh when you can.

Either way the sun comes up tomorrow on a new day.

I got through this year by starting everyday with positive thoughts.  Make them the most important part of your morning.  Best Affirmations is a program to change the way you think, so you can live your dreams.

Click on the link and keep those positive anniversary sayings playing in your head 24/7/365! Best Affirmations

Many blessings,

Carrie

Heart Failure Solutions

PS– Remember everyday:

1. Relax and Release tension
2. Take deeep breaths
3. Be active in a way that adds joy to your life

Plus pure water ~whole foods~sunshine~and laughter

Did You Start Your Marriage With Peace, Love and Happiness?

Important beginnings should be infused with peace, love, and happiness, don’t you think?

Jill and Kevin got it right!  So many people are sharing their joy that it has been viewed almost 18,000,000 times on YouTube.

Check out their wedding march!  It will touch your heart!  Talk about starting your life together with FUN!

Marriage is certainly a very important life changing event, and there are many others that significantly effect your life.

• Beginning college
• Engagement to be married
• Starting a new carreer
• Having a baby
• Adopting a baby
• Heck even adopting a pet, they do become members of the family!
• Meeting a new friend that you feel you’ve known all your life
• Even the end of a job is a brand new opportunity
• The loss of your health

Hey wait a minute!

Peace, love, and happiness?

Ok, maybe when you lose a job you should approach it with a positive attitude so that you can motivate yourself toward the job of your dream.

BUT, HOW do you begin a DISEASE process with love, peace and happiness?

“Give me a break!”

NOBODY is peaceful or happy to be sick!

One thing is certain!  If you don’t find peace with what is……

it WILL kill you!

What you resist persists!  It’s a fact!

Acceptance will set you free!

Once you are free of resistance, you can become a student of health.  However, you should be aware that there is a lot more to building health than eating right and exercise.

“Many people are not only dying because of what they eat, but because of what’s eating them.”  – Les Brown

Les Brown is an incredible person who has not only survived a disease process, but is planning to inspire others with a seminar called “You Are More Powerful Than Cancer”.

He will be teaching about:

• The role of Mindset in healing
• Radically changing your behavior
• Changing your relationships

Les says that if you have too many toxic negative relationships in your life, you need to let some of them go.  If you don’t, you will end up trying to change them, and “it’s a full time job trying to change yourself”.

Les Brown is a powerful voice of wisdom!

Listen and Live!

If what Les is proposing seems just too difficult to apply, get a powerful tool that can help you make that leap!

Heart Math can help you make any change you want to!

Get a 15% discount off your order, compliments of Heart Failure Solutions, by entering our coupon code after you enter your credit card information.

The coupon code is HRTSOL.

Click on Heart Math and use your coupon code now!  Arm yourself with this powerful tool!

Heart Math

Many blessings,

Carrie

Heart Failure Solutions

PS– Remember everyday:

1. Relax and Release tension
2. Take deeep breaths
3. Be active in a way that adds joy to your life

Plus pure water ~whole foods~sunshine~and laughter

Maria Mar Is a Powerful Voice of Wisdom, What Can She Teach You?

Maria Mar is a genius.  She knows how to speak in a way that makes your soul sit up straight and pay attention.

No kidding!

After writing my blazing “Are You Swallowing Your Truth?” post, my dear friend Joyce from Lessons From Lyrics sent me a link to Maria’s recent post.  Since I felt the urge to share it with everyone I care about it, it was the logical choice to reblog it right here.

Thank You for your inspirational teaching Kumu Maria Mar!

Love Them, But Leave Them

Releasing those who keep you trapped in the old world

written by Maria Mar on July 3, 2009

Today I am writing about a painful subject. It is not easy to release habits. But when you realize that a friend you love, or an old client to whom you have dedicated lots of time, is keeping you spinning in old, harmful habits. What do you do?

I am talking about those moments in life when you have crossed the threshold into a new world. You left dysfunctional habits behind. You stepped into your dream. You released the thoughts and responses that were keeping you from being happy and fulfilling your potential.

You are now your dream, or closer to it than ever. In this new world, you feel the Essence of who you are. You are strong in your faith. You are nurturing your dream every day. You are sustaining your Dream Discipline, dedicating time and space to yourself and your dream. You have given yourself permission to be happy.

Many of the people who love you have understood that you changed. They have supported you in your dreams. They have been able to adapt to your new dynamics. By you changing your set of beliefs, thoughts and attitudes, your relationship with most people around you has improved greatly.

But there is this friend…

There is still this old client…

There are sometimes those who refuse to change because they are the slaves of the Dog of Habit. They allow the Dog of Habit to piss all over you and themselves. They chose not to change.

There are those who danced well with you when you did not set limits, when you caretook them in their every whim, when you kept giving when they were not receiving.

But the minute you set limits, stop caretaking and stand in your value, these people begin to escalate their old, dysfunctional behavior. This is their way of exerting control in a life that feels out of control. Your change feels to them as if they are losing control. They cannot honor your new dynamics. Basically, they do not fit in your new world.

What then?

People are not like a dress that you can take off. Love is not a habit that you can simply release, is it?

Well, sometimes it is.

We believe that friends are forever. This is not true. Love may be forever, but a friend may not. The love you have for a person, if it is true, if it has to do with their Essence, is eternal.

But what happens when that person herself does not honor her own Essence? Can you love her for the beauty of her soul when she is betraying that soul trying to control and manipulate others? When he is dishonoring that soul by being unfaithful or by being insensitive to others?

My answer is this. Love them, but leave them.

If you do not release these people in a good way, out of love, when there is still the possibility of simply moving away gently ~you may come to the point of a serious clash. Then you will have to leave in the middle of a fight or in a bitter way.

When someone you love is toxic to you, you need to release this person as an act of love for yourself and for him or her.

By toxic, I do not mean that they are finding it difficult to deal with your change. That’s normal. I don’t mean that they “make you” feel this or that way. No one “makes” you feel. That is giving your power away. If this is the case, assume the responsibility for your feelings, attitudes and responses.

What I mean by toxic is that they are not willing to respect your limits. Toxic to you are friends who repeatedly dishonor or betray you. Toxic are friends who play mind games. Toxic are people who are unwilling or unable to see how their acts affect others, how they are affecting you. Toxic people are blamers. They always have an excuse and a finger pointing somewhere else. There is no way that you can come to terms with people like that. You will be trying forever. Toxic are those who take, but do not receive. Toxic are those who take, but do not give.

Toxic people take you for granted. Their actions (and sometimes even their words) consistently reveal that they not value you. They put you down with words or actions. They make you invisible. They refuse to name the beauty and love you bring into their lives.

Toxic friends trample on your faith and speak only cynical words that take away all the magic and goodness in life.

Toxic friends may be charmers, but they cannot commit to love, to you or to their own words. These toxic friends do not know what they want. They keep asking for your help, only to drop the entire project the minute you committed your contacts or time to their support. You end up exhausted and your reputation is damaged with these toxic friends.

Toxic are people who begin a full-fledge war against your happiness, who do everything they can to bring you back to a place of suffering, so that you stay with them in their misery.

Toxic clients are those who keep asking for more and take everything, but do not RECEIVE it. Because they are not allowing the love in what you give to touch them, they do not FEEL the value of it. As a result, they always want more and nothing is enough. They do not value the gifts because in their emotional world, they have not let the gift in.

They do not trust or value your expertise. Because they do not value themselves, they distrust the value of anyone associated with them. Once they hire you, they do not value you. They will ask for others’ opinions and act on those opinions, even if these other people are not experts. They will not follow your counsel and when their actions lead them to failure, they will fail to see that it was not your counsel, but their stupidity that lead them to that end.

Toxic clients haggle about the price of your service. They pay late and come up with excuses. They do not do their work and then complain that your service is not working. They give you the materials late and procrastinate, so that you cannot fulfill your contract with them. Then they come back after the contract date is over and want you to be their time slave and keep on working for them.

It is hard to understand how saying goodbye can be an act of love. But if your love for another is betraying your love for yourself, then it will soon become poison, not love. The only loving thing to do is leave.

Most of us hold on to toxic love because we are afraid to be alone. We are afraid to be rejected. We are afraid to go out into a world full of strangers. Will we make new friends? Will they love us? So we stay in toxic relationships.

If you are facing such a relationship now, use the descriptions in this blog to evaluate it. Is this friend or client toxic? Is your love or loyalty for this person running against your loyalty and love for yourself?

If the answer is yes, love them, but leave them.

No one deserves that you betray your soul, your happiness and your potential. No one deserves that you go back to your old world, becoming a ghost just for them. That option is not love. It is not love for them. And it is certainly not love for yourself.

Maria Mar(c)

Maria Mar is the Dream Alchemist, an inspirational poet, speaker, coach, author and spiritual teacher who helps women create the life of their dreams. Visit her at: Catch the Dream Express!

Hey like your Grandma always told you,

Let Go, and Let God!

Thanks again Maria Mar, for the loving nudge in the right direction.

Do you need some love and support that might help you to take action in a positive direction?

A Good Energy Mastermind might be just the compass you need.

Let’s get you on the right path now!

Join a fellowship of people with positive energy who can give you a new perspective on your life.

The Results Might Just Shock You!

You are invited to honor your soul, your happiness and your potential!

Click on Healthy Solutions Mastermind below and let’s talk about the many ways it might change YOUR life!

Healthy Solutions Mastermind Group

Many blessings,

Carrie

Heart Failure Solutions

PS– Remember everyday:

1. Relax and Release tension
2. Take deeep breaths
3. Be active in a way that adds joy to your life

Plus pure water ~whole foods~sunshine~and laughter

Are You Swallowing the Truth So You Don’t Burn Your Bridges?

Sometimes it is hard to take a stand because you are afraid of what it will cost you.

Will you sell your soul to the devil if the payoff is high enough?

“No way!  Never!”

Are you sure?

Sometimes the devil comes disguised as a well intentioned person who promises to help you fulfill your dearest dreams.

Hey, they care about you when nobody else does!

If that is what it takes to get what you want, then maybe you need to over look the facts.

Facts can just be so stifling!

After all, you are not the devil, and you are not guilty of his crimes. Read more

Got Love? Can a Free Relationship Quiz Help You Realize the Value of Connection In Your Life?

The interesting thing about Love is that the more you giveaway, the more you receive.

It’s a bit baffling why some folks seem to have a shortage of Love.

Are they unaware that giving Love increases Love?

Don’t they know that it is sustainable?

Do you value relationship above everything else in your life?

If you don’t, you are robbing yourself!

The love you are with-holding from the world could be inspiring joy, creativity, laughter and good energy!

Create connections in your life.

You will have more ways to share love and receive it.

When you create strong connections to the people you love and value, your relationships flourish.

Get relationships right and your wealth, health and happiness will be right.

Free Relationship Quiz: Read more

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